Here are some symptoms for you to watch for:
1. Inability to get up.
After laying down for a couple of hours to watch a marathon of That 70's Show, Friends, Degrassi, or other, you feel something wrong. You look down and look at your stomach, and scream "HOLY FLYING FLAMING MUSTACHES! WHAT IS THAT?" that my friend, is your newly bulged stomach. Either you are pregnant, or have developed a side effect of Lazisclerosisphobiaisis.
2. Your face looks all weirdish
After developing this disorder/disease/HORRIFICMONSTROSITY you will have layed in your bed entirely awake, but refusing to get up. When you do get up after your friend __________ yells at you to get up, you get your mooch self up, and pretend to be doing something productive. But, the side effect has already taken over. You have drool smudged all around your face, a bagizzilion pimples, and a crease in your face at where the pillow touched you. You look like an idiot, and your breath smells like what I would imagine Forrest Gumps breath would smell like. Your friendd __________ looks at you weird, then shakes his head, pitying you and your lazisclerosisphobiasis.
3. You smell like dead fish
You probably will not have showered in several days, due to your lack of normalpersonness. You smell like a room of dead fish. No joke. When you walk out into traffic. Cars jump off of bridges to escape your stench. It gets so bad, that you make blind people see again, and people who can see go blind. You are more nasty than the inside of a McDonalds bathroom. PLEASE SHOWER. IMMEDIATELY. THAT IS THE ONLY CURE TO THIS SIDE EFFECT! USE SOAP! If you continue to not shower, and keep up this symptom, you will end up creating the zombie apocalypse. is that really what you want?
Watching a little bit of reality t.v. is never so bad. Watching the Bachelor every Monday night is not bad at all. But imagine watching 72 hours of it. No. breaks. If you can stand this, you are probably braindead, in a coma, or a victim of the Laziness disease.
5. You end up not knowing what real person pants look like.
After a while, your legs will only know what sweatpants and pajamas feel like. You will forget about all else.After a while, your lges will only be able to identify sweatpants and pajamas. You will go out in public, and you will wonder "what are those people wearing?" those are called either jeans or spandex. if you see spandex, run.
6. Death
At some point, you will become so unaware of the real world, with your Lazisclerosisphobiaisis, that you will end up dying, because you didnt realize that your boyfriend/girlfriend/unknown whom dumped you because they/it got sick of you not doing anything. So you forgot that they didnt live with you anymore. So you know that it was their job to chain up the house. So while your lying on the couch, eating cheese balls by the dozen, and washing it down with a XXL coke, you dont notice whats going on. You wonder what that weird THUD THUD THUD is, and why the Earth is shaking, and what is that warmth on your neck? Finally you turn around, and theres a velociraptor, in your house. It escaped from Jurassic Park, and it has now gruesomely eaten you.
As you can see, Lazisclerosisphobiaisis, is a very scary disease. Be afraid, and do the necessary steps to stay away from Lazisclerosisphobiaisis. What you should do, is get to cleaning things. I would suggest cleaning a friends house for free. If your my friend, I suggest you clean mine. Another thing you can do, is make sure to cook all of a friends meals. Also, make friends with people with Lazisclerosisphobiasis. If you do, then your friendes will mooch off of you, and you wont have time to acquire the disease. Hey, want to be friends?
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